A Christmas Quilt

The before mentioned quit went to the Mayes Family for Christmas.

It's precious and I hope it keeps their little precious one warm for years to come.

Christmas Conversations

I get stressed really easily and I worry about things...a lot. And this Christmas has been hard when it comes to gift buying. I'm not sure what to get anyone! You'd think living with someone would make it easy but NO! When we need something, we buy it! And now we have everything we need. Great.

When it comes to shopping, Daniel and I have our different methods. And since now we're married, I think it's my responsibility to make sure he focuses. I've struggled with coming up with gift ideas this year for his family. We're in the car some time ago and this is how the conversation went:

Me: I don't know what to get your family! What do we get your brother? Your niece? Your Nephew?

Daniel: Don't worry about it! I'll take care of it. I started a list today at work.

Me: That's GREAT! What's on it?

Daniel: Their names.

Me: *silence*

I'm going to trust my Beloved. I'm going to trust my Beloved......

Until next time...

Searching for My Inner Suzy Homemaker

I want so bad to be Suzy Homemaker. I want to sew and cook and keep a clean house. But I don't think it's in me. I think I'm missing that essential DNA strand.

I've been working on a little quilt and it might result in my husband selling my sewing machine while I'm at work. This is the problem, I want to sit at the machine and everything go perfectly well. I want to magically pick up the scissors and the fabric be cut! I want the machine to have no problems and sew in a straight line every time. See how I put that responsibility on the machine? This might be part of my problem. I've had no training but feel as though it should just be ingrained in my DNA. I should sit and sew. That's it. But it's totally not. And thread gets screwy and I peddle too fast or I swerve toward the right. And I get frustrated. Really frustrated. When the dog sees the sewing machine come out, he hides. Yeah, it's that bad.

My Beloved is a very patient man and insists that perfection comes with practice. But I'm horribly irrational and a little bit crazy. Okay, maybe not a little.

The quilt is almost done and even with the imperfections, it's super cute! I'm at the part of the project where I have the "maybe I should just keep it" conversation and my poor husband just shakes his head. God bless him, his wife is a trial.

I've cried and cussed and thrown thread. Daniel promised to never mention it and I promised to never make another quilt. Sort of. ;)

Until next time...

What if there's never a right time?

So it's what happens when you get married, you talk about having kids. We have a lot of friends having babies and it seems like the right thing to do....eventually. But we're not ready. At all. I go through 30 minute spurts of wanting a baby. I pass through the baby aisle and see the cute little clothes and say "aww! I want a baby!" And then I'll pass a screaming child and it's "never mind, I don't want a baby."

I like sleep, a quiet house and I'm horribly selfish. And our floor is covered in dog hair, a crawling child would be subsequently covered in dog hair. That can't possibly be good. Then I'll see something else that makes me think it's a good idea...until I hear the labor story. Then it's a dumb idea. Who wants all that?! The Miracle of Life is completely lost on me. The Miracle of Life is gross.

We don't have jobs conducive to kids. Daniel works late and some days I work 12 hour work days. Who would watch the baby? My mom lives too far to babysit on a daily basis and we can't afford for either of us to stay home. And I'm horribly impatient. What if I'm a horrible mother? What if the baby cries and I don't know why? See - I'm back to thinking it's a bad idea.

How do you know? Do you ever know? Is it just a "jump and see where you land" thing? Shouldn't you have everything planned before you jump?

Having kids is a lot of responsibility and a forever commitment; and it's one I'm not sure I'm ready for. Until the next time I see a cute maternity top and think "aww!! It would be so cute to be pregnant!" How irrational is that?! See, totally not ready.

Until next time....