Oh the Horror!

My Beloved and I spend a lot of time in the car and it always surprises me at the different things we notice. He will see things I miss and I will catch things he doesn't. It's fun! Well, while out running errands the other day, my Beloved glances over at a shopping center, says "Oh man, I wish I hadn't seen that" and then shakes his head in disgust.
"See what?" I ask.
"That sign. I don't want to think about it - it upsets me too much." he says, clearly upset by something.
I turn around to see what he is talking about. And this is it: It made me laugh. "It's giving me heart burn" he says, "it better be owned by more than one Stephanie."
I say "There is famine and war and death in the world and THAT is what upsets you?!"
"Famine and war and death are inevitable! There is no excuse for bad punctuation!" he says.
Now we try to avoid driving by said establishment. It makes my Beloved very sad. :)
Until next time....

The Cat's Meow

I work in an old building that is not in the best of shape. This being said, we have a problem with critters making their way in to our building. A few weeks ago as I'm sitting at my desk I hear a tiny little 'meow' coming from my ceiling. OMG! I quickly call my coworker who swiftly comes down to my office. I shush her and we wait. 'MEOW!' OMG! We tell the building guy and he says 'crap'. He hates when critters invade his building. Eventually the hidden kitten moves on and the meowing stops. Thankfully! I can't handle the meows - they stress me out.

Fast forward to last week.

I arrive to work to find the doors to the lab shut, the lights off and the front door propped open. Ummmm. It turns out the kittens have been caught and now we're waiting for the mom to come out of the attic. The kittens are placed in a box in a room with the attic door open. And we wait. Then the meowing starts. We keep going in to check on the little creatures - they are so cute! And we look for the Momma at the attic door. By this time I have visions of the angry momma landing on my head - this makes me jumpy. Okay, so it makes me MORE jumpy. Whatever. I glance up to the attic, see eyes and squeal. This scares the momma and back to the attic she goes. This is probably my fault. Friday when I arrive the scene is much the same! Meows all around and now two attic doors are opened. The Mom gets close but is too scared to jump down. Silly cat. We're standing in the hall talking when I happen to glance up and see the Momma hanging out of the attic door. Full scream this time. Yep. She goes back in to hiding. They set a trap over the weekend and somehow the tricksy momma managed to eat the food, trip the trap and escape. Clever little thing.

By yesterday the entire front of the building smelled like Tuna and cats - yuck. The cute little kittens (that were cute for all of 2 seconds before they started hissing) took a trip to a local shelter where they are sure to be adopted. The poor Mom got left behind. She spent the rest of yesterday crying at the attic door. She's fraying my nerve. I hope she finds her way out soon.

I tell my Beloved how sad she must be to have her little babies taken from her! He said cats don't think like that. I asked him how he knew cats didn't think like that! He was never a cat! They don't talk! And he said he just knows these things. Uh huh.

Until next time...

More of this and that....

Peepers: We spent this past weekend at Mom's house all together. Travis came home with what he thought was a scratched eye but turned out to be a very bad eye infection, one that required drops every hour on the hour. While mom was busy cooking I offered to administer the drops. She said the drops are on his nightstand. No problem! I got this! I reach his room, pick up the bottle of eye stuff, tell the sleeping Child to hold his eye open and put a drop in. And then I realize there is another tiny bottle of eye stuff on his clock - where mom said it would be. Oops. I tell the Child I put the wrong drops in and to hold his eye open again. This wakes him up! "YOU PUT THE WRONG DROPS IN?!" It was an honest mistake! And one I only made ONCE!! In all fairness, I was only allowed to put drops in his eye one more time after that. One out of two ain't bad! I come back down the stairs and Mom says "you weren't up there for half a second before he was screaming, what on earth?" So I told her what happened which made her take a deep breath and shake her head. He can still see! I think....

The Power is Gone: I had a feather in my hair. It was cute and blue and a little bit rebellious (not really - everyone and their grandma has feathers in their hair) and last night it fell out. :( It also pulled out several strands of hair. This morning I wake up cranky because I didn't sleep a wink last night. I think my favorite wine is starting to work against me; I spent the night tossing and turning. While getting dressed this morning I struggled with my shirt sleeves (seriously, why must they make the cuffs so tight?!) which made my Beloved and the dog very entertained. In my annoyance and defeat, I say "My feather is gone, I've lost all my power." This makes my Beloved laugh because he's married to a total nutcase.

Me & Jim Dale: He reads to me when I'm driving. He does all the voices just like I hear them (except Moaning Myrtle). Since Judy's accident (it was probably mostly my fault) she has a lot of road noise. I'm not sure what the issue is but she now screams at me when we're on the freeway (this is probably mostly my fault as well) so I have to play my Harry Potter books really loud. And I didn't realize this until the other day but you can clearly hear Jim from outside of my car. So when I roll to a stop light and the cars next to me are looking at me like I'm crazy, it makes me laugh. Yeah, I blare my Harry Potter books!! I'm gangsta like that! ;)

Until next time....

My Poopie

I'm not sure how long ago I started calling my little sister that but it stuck. And it's all I call her now which makes for some fun faces when we're in public. :) She doesn't mind...I think.

Anyway! Yesterday was her birthday and we spent the weekend with her at Mom's house. All the Martin children under one roof. It was a little loud and totally exhausting but a whole lot of fun.

I adore my baby sister. She was my very first friend. She let me dress her up and boss her around. She makes me laugh. She's messy. We quote movies ALL THE TIME. She reminds me of the babe. ;) She's one of the first people I want to call when something sad or good or funny has happened. Captain Planet is our hero. She is the Night to my Day. If you've ever met her, you'd understand - we are total opposites. She would have my back in a fight but be the first to tell me I am being dumb. She's a hard worker. She has bad ankles so don't walk too close to her because she'll take you down with her! We are Losers - together. She brings me joy.

And I love her. A whole lot.

And I couldn't imagine a world without her. LOSERS UNITE!!

Happy Birthday Poopie!

Until next time.....

D*#%

I love my husband and I'm very thankful he loves me too. And he even KNOWS me!! He understands I get a little ragey when I let the house work pile up. He can predict his evening by judging if I had to go to Walmart or not. He can tell how cranky I'm going to be by what shoes I wear to work. He knows how crazy I get when I take on a project.

So last night when I told him I wanted to paint the hallway yellow, he looked a little worried. I then explained I wanted to paint it with alternating flat paint and glossy paint like I saw on Pinterest. His response - 'D*#% Pinterest'.

And then later when I told him Craft Hope has a new project posted, he winced. I told him it was sewing cute sock monkeys!! Sock monkeys can't be hard to sew, right? His response - 'D*#% Craft Hope.'

He doesn't mean to take it out on the sites that facilitate my issues, it's just the only way to express himself. He knows any additional project I take on right now might push me over the ledge I'm always teetering on. :)

When I told him I was going to blog about this, he said.....you guessed it! 'D*#% blog.' :)

He might take my smart phone away and ban me from all things online.

Only he won't cuz he loves me. Silly boy. :)

Until next time......