Sassy Speaks

We are in so much trouble. Period. While Alice might not have an expansive vocabulary, the words and phrases she is comfortable with are worrisome. 

A few weeks ago, after asking her teacher to chase her and being turned down, she told her "you're kiyying me!" (You're killing me.) This is my fault. I was convinced her first sentences would be either "you're killing me" or "pull yourself together, baby" because I said them to her over and over and over again. 

If I had a dollar for every time she said, 'I told you, Momma!' - I would have a lot of dollars. Like, a lot, a lot. This phrase, spoken often, instantly makes my eyebrows retreat to my hairline. Instantly. 

I'm not sure who taught her, "yeah, guess so" but we hear that a lot too. 
"Alice, do you want to eat?"
"Yeah, guess so."

"Alice, do you love (insert name here)."
"Yeah, guess so" with a shoulder shrug because complete indifference is totally in right now.

She also has no sense of time, yet she thinks "not yet" and "in a minute" and "almost time" are appropriate responses to direct orders. Y'all. 

She's all "I a big girl" until it's clean up time. Then it's, "I too yittle. I cian't do it." Uh huh.

Don't even get me started on her backseat driving! 

You hit a bump - "careful, Momma, careful!"

You're sitting in traffic - "GO!! Just go, Momma!"

You stop at a red light - "Why you stop?! GO!"
"The light is RED! We can't go until it's GREEN!"
*annoyed sigh* "Pine!" (fine)

When you pull out of the driveway - "Not dis way!! DAT way!" while pointing to complete opposite direction. 

She's 3. Do you know how many years of backseat driving we have left to look forward to?! I'm not actually doing the math on that because it might make me throw up. 

She's a 100% drama all of the time. I know this is karma because she is such a mini-me, it's terrifying. I call and apologize to my mother daily. 

She'll ask for something and I'll say she can have it. Then she says, "you go get it" Ummm.....no ma'am. Your legs work. 

She also says some pretty sweet stuff. She 'wubs' everything and things are her most 'paborite'. She LOVES picking 'powers' in the backyard. She says "this is so awesome!" frequently. She says 'yook' for 'look', 'pind' for 'find, and 'pone' for 'phone'. These are getting better every day which is a little bit bittersweet. Our growing Little Bitty.

She says "sweet dreams, Momma" before bed and no matter how much drama the day has had or how frustrating bedtime has been, I smile. Because it's precious.

And we 'wub' her so, drama and all.

Until next time.....