New Adventures

We have been totally blessed and fortunate that I've been able to stay home with Alice. We knew it wasn't a forever thing and we are so very thankful we've managed to make it work this long. With her 2nd birthday approaching, we often discuss what I want to go back to work doing. When she starts school, I want to have something to do.

This is how that conversation goes...

My Beloved - So, what do you see yourself doing?
Me - I don't know! I feel like I'm not qualified to do anything anymore.
Him - Well, that's not true. Okay, what do you want from a job?
Me - Well....I don't really want a boss or to get up early. And I NEVER want to drive in Houston traffic. And I don't want to put Alice in daycare because I don't want her to need anyone else but me!! 

And then the tears start and my sweet Beloved says, "okay, so you're not ready. We can talk about this later." 

I'm 30(something) years old and I STILL don't know what I want to be when I grow up. 

Well that's not true, I do. 

I want to be Alice's mom. I want to be here when she gets home from school. I don't want to stress about who will leave work to pick her up if she gets sick. I don't want to be stuck in traffic stressing about getting to daycare on time. 

I want to be here for her. Always.

But I also want to earn a paycheck. And she isn't earning an allowance yet so she can't pay me. 

A few weeks back I was deleting my one and only TV credit off of our DVR. It's a credit I got for transcribing some interviews for a storm special on KHOU. I did a lot of transcribing in my job at the Rodeo so it's not something foreign to me. That got me thinking - I could do that at home! So I did some searching and jobs in medical transcription kept popping up. I mention this to Daniel who says they offer certification in that at his school. It's a three semester (for full time students) program and since Daniel is an employee at the college, I can take the courses tuition free. Praise the Lord! 

So we discussed it and I looked through the courses and before I knew it, I had applied for college. Again.

I said I would NEVER go back to school. Well, you know what they say.....

It will take me longer because I'm not going full time. But I should be finished by the time she starts school. 

Now, as for Alice. She is at the age where we feel she NEEDS to be around other kids. She longs to talk to them and watch them. And I need baby steps. If the first time she leaves me is the first day of Kindergarten, I might need to be heavily medicated. And by 'might', I obviously mean WILL. So this week we registered her in a Mother's Day Out program at our neighborhood church. 

I'm both extremely excited and totally terrified. But through my doubts, my heart is telling me this is where we need to be.

I debated about sharing. I have this crazy notion I'll jinx things. What if I'm horrible at school? It's been about a minute (more like 11 years) since I've been a student. What if I give up? What if I'm not a cool kid? What if Alice gets kicked out for biting? What if Alice who has never used a word in her life decides to use one of Mommy's not nice words with her teacher the first week?! 

But I decided THAT'S worth sharing too. 

This is my creative, sharing outlet. And I miss it when I don't have time to write. Maybe with Alice in school, I'll have a few extra moments to jot down our new adventures. And surely our adventures will be note worthy! ;)

So, here we go...