Field Trippin'

Today was our very first field trip ever. 

And it was......interesting.

We never went on field trips in school with the exception of 5th grade when they took us by bus to the Junior High to show us where we would be the next year. That's it. We went on field trips with our day care but never in school.

But these Kindergartners got to go to the Zoo!

To me a field trip means everyone rides the bus together and wears matching shirts and goes around as a class exploring.

Only that's not how her school does it. Nope.

For her field trip, the parents drive themselves, take their own kid plus one or two (who ride in on the bus) and visit the zoo at their own pace. And the teachers love it because Kindergarten parents love to attend a first field trip so the teachers get to walk around all by themselves. 

Alice comes home yesterday and tells me the name of the other girl in our group. I prepare for me plus 2. However, at the gathering this morning I am told that the other little girl's mom was able to come too so I only have Alice.

Basically, I am taking Alice to the Zoo on a school day with their permission. 

It is discussed in our gathering that all of the major roads into downtown Houston are currently closed so I asked Google Maps to help. Google Maps is outdated and failed me miserably and I ended up on the other side of Minute Maid Park going the wrong direction because an entire exit no longer exists and no one informed the Google. 

This makes me frazzled. My child will be the only one waiting for their way late parent.

I scream and lament and curse but I manage to make it to the Zoo before the kids. 

The zoo is PACKED! I'm pretty sure most other schools in the greater Houston area are ALL at the zoo (in matching shirts and walking in large groups by the way!)

Finally the bus arrives, I gather my child and we take off. 

My mother calls Alice "10-minute-Alice" because that is her attention span. Only at the zoo it's "10-second-Alice." If they built a zoo like they did airports with moving walkways through the exhibits - I think Alice would be a happy camper.

We are there from about 10am to 1pm and by 11am Alice is basically done.Her feet hurt,  it smells, she's tired, she hates snakes, she wants to pet EVERY SINGLE RANDOM PIGEON WE SEE and she HAS to have the stuffed Red Panda because she LOVES it the best. And also, it's hot. 

By noon, I am counting down the seconds. 

We make it to the meeting point with lots of time to spare - I was taking NO chances - and once all the children show up and they head towards the buses, I leave. 

The teachers mention that if we want, we can check our kids out early at the office.

NOPE!! You keep my child until 3:45pm, thankyouverymuch.

I call mom from the parking lot while I'm getting in to my car. As I am turning the wrong way on MacGregor, I glance over and see a very tall, VERY naked man walking towards the zoo. He is holding what looks like a small amount of clothing in his left hand and that's it. 

He looks like he was running to the zoo only all his clothes suddenly burst into flames and he had no other option than to waltz naked towards the zoo. I mean, when you want to see the elephants, you WANT TO SEE THE ELEPHANTS! 

My sister asked why he was naked like it's a totally normal reaction to roll down your window and ask a completely naked stranger why he is heading to the zoo sans clothes. Nope, that was not what I chose to do. I chose to look around like, "everyone can see the naked man, right!?" and then proceeded to a location where I could right my driving wrong. 

And then I sat behind a bunch of buses for about 15 minutes.

When I made it back to my original location, there was a police car with it's lights on and I'm assuming a naked man in his back seat. 

It made the news so I am confident I was NOT the only person to see the naked Zoo man.

This is all way more than I bargained for for a memorable First Field Trip experience. 

Incidentally, this is the third time I have encountered a random naked man. For such a prude, I seem to find myself in the wrong place at the wrong time quite often. 

And this is basically how the entire month has gone. (Not the naked man part - only the everything-is-a-hot-mess part.)

More on that later......

Both my mother and sister asked if I got a picture of said Naked Zoo Man and I let them know that I BARELY got a picture of my own child at the zoo today. What kind of mother would I be to get a picture of the naked man and not my child on her first field trip?!

So here's the one I got. 

Of the kid, not some random naked dude.

Until next time..........