Backyard Shenanigans

You know, we do not live in a particularly rural area and we have a dog that spends quite a bit of time in our backyard. And YET our fenced in area seems to call to all the creatures in the area - "Come! Come and you will make her crazy!"

I do not do nature. And sometimes this house involves WAY TOO MUCH NATURE.

So far since living in this house:
* I have had to break up 3 cat fights (we do not have any cats).
* We've had to save cats from our dog 3 times. One of those times required a call to animal control.
* We have witnessed several birds get taken down by hawks. Several. One on our front porch. While we watched helplessly.
* We've had a turtle 'knock' on our front door. My Beloved relocated it to the bayou behind our house.
* We've had to run off opossums after they've been spotted by the dog.
* We've had a raccoon in our trees in the backyard. 
* There were the rats...
* I had to run a little yippy dog out of our backyard who spent the entire time barking at ME, the homeowner. 

And that brings us to this weekend. 

Friday while my Beloved is getting ready for work, Atticus starts barking at something with dedication. Daniel heads out to the fence line and discovers the offender.

A turtle.

Of all the fence lines in all the neighborhood, this turtle had to pick ours. We assumed with it digging a hole and planting it's back end in it, she was probably laying eggs. Alice was very excited about seeing the turtle. "He's soooo cute!! I wub him!"

We come back in and eat, which only takes 30 minutes, and when we go out to check on her again, she's gone! The hole is covered back up and the turtle has vanished. And it's all my fault because I made Alice go inside the first time. Obviously. 

Now what?! I feel like these potential eggs are our responsibility! Do they need a warming light? I'm googling gestation periods of turtles, which according to the Internet could be anywhere from 60 - 90 days. I can barely remember if I fed the dog. This is not going to work.....


Now let's talk about Saturday....

Daniel had graduation so he was out of the house early. I get up and let the dog out. As I'm looking over things, I notice a dead adolescent opossum on our porch. 

Sweet baby Jesus, why does this keep happening?!?? 

I keep my eye on the dog and as soon as he gets to the porch I open the door and rush him in. Luckily he isn't the most observant and didn't seem to notice it at all. I text my Beloved and send him a picture because it's one of those things that if there wasn't a picture you might be tempted to think it's made up.

Nope. 

From my vantage point (INSIDE), it doesn't look like it's hurt. It looks like it got a third of the way across our back porch, which is not easy for a little dude, and decided, "nope, that was just too much" and keeled over. 

I am positive it was not there the day before, however, it is already attracting flies. 

NOPE!! 

Daniel calls between ceremonies and as we're talking I mention it's hair looks funny. It's either wet or mangy, I can't tell. He suggests calling Animal Control to check to see if they want to handle it. So I call the weekend non-emergency number and explain what's going on. I ask if that's something they would prefer to handle and she says 'yes ma'am'. Hallelujah. I tell her exactly where it is and how he can get into the backyard. She says the guy has two previous stops and will hit ours last. 

Cool.

I open the front door to watch for him. I see his truck pull up and I go the bedroom to put on some shoes so I can go out to talk to him. The dog is barking at the truck. I look out and don't see him so I head to the back porch and the dead thing is gone!! I turn around to see the truck drive off. He was like a dead animal scooping Ninja. 

Side observation: This is yet another example of my doubt in Atticus's ability to be a beneficial guard dog. He spent the entire time barking at the set of tires he could see from the front door and completely ignored the shovel carrying man on our back porch. Seriously. 

I appreciate them coming so swiftly, however, I have some questions that would be nice to get answered. How did it die? Should we be concerned? 

What is it about our back porch that screams to the dying animals, "this. This is where I want to die." It's a lot of work to get on our porch!! The lady next door has no challenging obstacles!! Why can't they die there!?!? 

I just can't.

Until next time......